I have a serious question, and I ask any of you who might stumble across this to offer your opinion. Friend or stranger. Expert or not. This is a situation that has been plaguing me, and I'm hesitant to bring it up until I've fully considered the situation.
I have two friends, from different circles of friendship, that I'm worried have a substance abuse problem of sorts.
The first friend is simply a heavy drinker. This friend doesn't really use any other substances. Even caffeine doesn't seem to be a staple in his diet. But he drinks. He blacks out. Often. For this friend it's less that he's always drinking, and more that when he does he DRINKS. Still, as far as I know, he never calls in sick for a hangover, and makes it a point never to drink and drive. Is his regular heavy drinking a problem, or simply poor judgement?
My other friend isn't a heavy drinker, but he's constantly using something. Sometimes he's popping pills, sometimes he's smoking pot, sometimes he's drinking. Often it's a combination. He doesn't tend to black out, but he often drives in this condition. Again, he doesn't take sick days for hangovers, and I don't think he goes to work under the influence (other than caffeine, which he does like). He tends to come prepared, so he always has something available (pill, pot or airplane bottle of booze) if he's somewhere without alcohol. Is he okay because he doesn't do this to excess, or is his regular use cause for concern?
It's important to note that I've found myself uncomfortable with both of them because of their substance use, and how it changes their personalities. The heavy drinker tends to apologize the next morning, the habitual user does not make any reference to it. I may have switched the gender on one or both of these people, if that makes a difference.
Please help me understand! What would you do?